Tender Points by Amy Berkowitz

Author:Amy Berkowitz
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Nightboat Books
Published: 2021-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

6 Essential Items for Your Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Cave

1. Unemployed Boyfriend

With few commitments, your unemployed boyfriend has plenty of time to spend hanging out in your cave. No job means no need to shave, so it’s likely that he has a sexy beard. Because he’s depressed, a cave feels comfortable to him, too. Like you, he’s grateful for its shelter. Although talking about emotions may not come naturally to him, he has felt terrible pain, and he is kind.

2. Pot

Have you ever wanted the world to stop existing? Pot kind of works for that. While the world may contain rapists, twice-denied short-term disability claims, and any number of other revolting and evil things, the cave contains nothing revolting or evil. Seal the barrier between cave and world with a thick plume of smoke.

3. Power Pop

In the late 1970s, thousands of men in denim jackets were hard at work writing the tightest, catchiest three-minute pop songs about love and girls and nice weather. While most of these songs have been forgotten, so many of them achieve perfection. Only people who have known real pain can make songs so precisely engineered to manifest feelings of dumb, broad joy. Shake Some Action, Live in the Sun, Blast the Pop, No Matter What, Rave It Up, Tomorrow Belongs to You. Invite the songs into your cave.

4. Condoms

Your unemployed boyfriend is gorgeous, and fucking him is the opposite of everything bad. You fuck while you’re having conversations. You fuck while you’re eating clementines. You fuck while you’re listening to power pop comps. You point out the drum fills to him. You lick his ear and stop to say, This part’s really good.

5. Flashbacks

It wouldn’t be a post-traumatic stress disorder cave without flashbacks to the trauma that made you retreat. The trauma was rape, so the flashbacks happen during sex. When you start to dissociate, stop and tell your boyfriend you feel scared. Ask him to please tell you his name and where you are. What year it is and how old you are. To please just keep telling you things about where you are. He holds you until you understand you’re 24 and he’s your boyfriend and you’re in your messy cave room in Brooklyn.

6. Diner

Getting out of the cave gets you out of your head; getting into the world gets you out of the memories that try to trap you. It feels good to put on clothes and walk to the diner. The diner is called Cozy Corner or it’s called Jimmy’s or it’s called Delight Diner and Donuts. You don’t know it, but you’re hungry and you’re probably dehydrated. Get a grilled cheese and a Coke and watch something on TV. Now you’re ready to return to your cave.

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